With my tendency to avoid ~fEeLIngsss~ like a well functioning adult, I’ve become quite the master in the art of distraction. So when I recognise that I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed, underwhelmed, anxious or just flat out BLAH I’ve built up a little collection of things that I do to distract myself from getting pulled into a pit of despair.
• Watch something that makes me giggle. This includes Community, Atlanta, New Girl, Parks & Rec., It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Curb Your Enthusiasm etc etc. I like silly things that I can absorb without feeling the need to keep up high levels of concentration. When my mental capacity is that of an old potato, I cannot be dealing with using my remaining brain power to do anything other than chuckle and dissolve into the couch.
• Podcasts. I don’t know why I hadn’t thought of listening to a podcast until fairly recently, they’re fantastic. I’m a total information sponge – I just love learning things. I tend to put one on in the background if I’m doing life admin like cooking or cleaning and it gives my mind something to focus on, and I normally get to learn something new.
• (Gotta get up, gotta get up) MOVE. Thank you Saint Motel, you are indeed correct. It’s not always something I feel like doing, but forcing myself to exercise or even just go for a walk or cycle tends to make me feel better, and it’s all down to releasing built up stress chemicals. Pretty good practice for overcoming agoraphobia too, although I do have to say I’m in a much, much better place with that.
• Baking. Yup. Some people eat their feelings, I bake mine. There’s a lot of cakes and biscuits being produced in our home at the moment. If you’ve never seen a grown woman holding back a sob whilst beating cake batter and find that image mildly amusing, feel free to pop over and watch.
• BuzzFeed. My all time favourite go-to when I feel a bit poop. If you’ve ever wanted to take a quiz to find out your age by selecting the best pizza toppings, look no further.
• Let my inner pensioner out. So, everyone that knows me will know that I am one seriously bad ass knitter. Gimme some needles and an abundance of biscuits and I’m good to go, repetitive tasks make me happy.
• Music, surprisingly, isn’t always a good distraction for me unless it’s seriously upbeat. So if I’m feeling shitty and for example Grouper’s Headache comes on a shuffled playlist, queue depressive burrito behaviour. It just makes my mind wander too much. Don’t get me wrong, if I’m feeling a-okay then I can listen to anything and everything but it’s a proceed with caution type of situation otherwise.
• Reading. I’m quite a proud bookworm so getting lost in a good book is the ultimate distraction for me. I read both a lot of non fiction and fiction – recent recommendations are I’m Travelling Alone and The Idiot Brain!
• Adult Dot-to-Dot. No, I don’t mean a Dot-to-Dot picture of someone getting fucked. It’s along the same lines as adult colouring, it’s so good for distraction but not always great when my patience is lacking.
I’m always looking for and thinking of new things to add to my list of distractions. I know a lot of people say running is a great way for them but hEGjagdndkdm, no. I do not, and will not run for anything unless there is some promise of food involved. Having a little back up for when I’m a bit blue is like a rescue remedy, but instead of relaxation which I know a lot of people automatically assume is what “self-care” consists of, I need to keep my brain active and busy by shifting my focus elsewhere.
My piano lessons are done for the day and I’m starting to find myself feeling really nervous because tonight marks the harpooning of my first white whale: Deftones. I don’t know why I’m so nervous, I’ve done this so so many times before that I can’t even count. In fact, it’s not even my first gig for a while. On Tuesday evening, I went along to Maida Vale with a couple of friends to watch Royal Blood perform quite an intimate set for Radio One (I know, me endorsing Radio One? What really is happening?) and I loved it, but it was quite a small audience in comparison to tonight. Maybe I’ve made it out to be such a big deal and personal achievement that I’ve put myself under pressure to do it. What I really need to do is go in with no expectations, just let the experience unfold as it does and what will be will be. I’m trying not to send myself into a panic, but ajdndjiejr. Here goes I guess.